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10 Steps to Writing Personal Wedding Vows

Putting your feelings into words is hard enough, now picture doing it in front of your family and friends on your wedding day! With so much time shared together, it can sometimes feel overwhelming trying to figure out how to write "the perfect wedding vows". So we thought we would make it a refreshing experience for you!

Challenging, yet rewarding, expressing your love in your own words gives you a chance to share just how excited you are to spend the rest of your lives together. But with less than three minutes to sum it all up, where do you begin?

To get yourself started, grab some paper, a couple of pens, highlighters, your phone, and of course, this guide. If you’re ready to give it a go, let’s get to work!

Step 1: Talk to your fiancé!

We know we have you all excited to write your vows, but we want to make sure you and your fiancé are on the same page! Checking in with each other will make sure that you two have similar ideas about what you want to do for your wedding vows. Maybe they are a little nervous about writing their vows and are more drawn to following the traditional script – this is the time to talk it out and figure out what works best for you.

Step 2: Make Time

When you have a chance to get away from the wedding preparations – take it! Find some time where you can slow down and escape the hustle and bustle. Now, this doesn’t mean you’ll get it all done in one day but starting ahead of time will make sure you don’t leave it to the last minute. Set yourself up in a cozy spot with a cup of tea (or drink of choice) and gear up for a walk down memory lane.

Step 3: Brainstorm

Take some time to look through your favorite pictures to remember all of the reasons you fell in love. Focus on the moments that meant the most to you and let the words flow. Don’t worry about how it sounds or if it all makes sense. Set aside your expectations of perfection and be genuine.

Think about things such as:

  • How would you describe your relationship in three words?

  • How do you feel when you see or think of your fiancé?

  • What do you love most about your partner?

  • Are there any significant moments that brought you two together?

  • Do you have any dreams about what your future life together will be?

  • What are some funny memories you have of your time together?

  • Each love story is unique so don’t worry about how much you write! This little brainstorm session can be done in either bullet points or sentences and take up anywhere from half a page to two of them.

Step 4: What promises do you want to make?

Think about how you picture your future life to feel and look like. What are some things that come to mind? Your promises to each other can take a serious tone - such as supporting each other through thick or thin - or something a little more lighthearted like vowing to let them have the last piece of cake! The key here is to be realistic and make it personal.

Step 5: Bring it all together

Now that you have some ideas jotted down, it’s time to bring it all together. Take out that highlighter and focus on the ideas that jump out to you. Once you have decided on the pieces that best describe your love, begin to stitch it all together.

Step 6: Take a break

​Step away from the vows. We repeat, step away! Give yourself a little break from writing and come back to it after a few days of letting them rest. Doing this will not only be a nice break but will also give you a fresh perspective. When you pick it back up, double-check that the words you have used to express your feelings are true and genuine. It’s easy to get caught up in all of the things you are expected to say and overlook the things that truly matter. This is your love story and no words are more important than your own.

Step 7: Revise, revise, revise!

Come back to look at your first draft with a fresh set of eyes. Now that you have written a rough copy of what you want to say, the next step is to reorganize, expand, and rewrite it. Using what you already have on the page, play around with the order until you feel like the text flows and makes sense. Next, take a look to see if there is anything else you want to expand on or highlight. If the answer is yes, add some more until it feels just right. Once you’re done, rewrite your vows onto a new piece of paper and tuck them away somewhere safe where your fiancé won’t find them!

Step 8: Practice makes perfect

We know it’s a cliché, but we can’t help it if it’s true! Practicing your vows out loud will make sure that you feel confident saying them on your wedding day. We recommend asking a friend to listen, practicing in front of a mirror, or even recording yourself to hear how it sounds. The goal here is not to rush and speak with emotion so that your love shines through. No need to spend hours practicing but do try to make sure you run it through a couple of times (or maybe a few more) to prepare for this special moment.

Step 9: Focus on your fiancé

This is the moment you have been waiting for. You’re standing at the altar and it’s your turn to say your vows. Nothing matters but you and your fiancé standing there looking at each other’s eyes. So, take a deep breath and let it all out. This is the moment you get to marry the love of your life.

Step 10: Save your vows!

The vows are read, you have said “I do”, and now you’re ready to dance the night away – but wait, what happened to your wedding vows? If you had a little note with you at the altar don’t throw it away! Saving your vows can be a special little keepsake to remind you of this special moment.

A Moment to Remember

Saying your vows is a moment that we want you to remember forever. Years down the line when the memories of this day grow faint, we want to help you bring your wedding day back to life. We as videographers love creating personalized cinematic wedding videos that make this moment timeless.

Check out some videos on our website to see how we can make this memory last forever.

Yours Always,

Daniel and Maria.

P.S: The pictures featured in this post are from the unique Elopement of Brittaney and Morgan. Check out the full video of their special moment here:

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